


Use your brain

by killerweasel



Series: The Man with Two Brains [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, crack!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2012-11-18
Packaged: 2017-11-19 00:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/567151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerweasel/pseuds/killerweasel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock's first case as a brain in jar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Use your brain

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Шевели мозгами](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3258893) by [WTF_MOSK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WTF_MOSK/pseuds/WTF_MOSK)



Title: Use your brain  
Fandom: _Sherlock_  
Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes, Lestrade, Donovan, Anderson  
Word Count: 982  
Rating: PG-13  
A/N: AU after _A Study in Pink_ , crack!fic

John hissed something at Sherlock as he got out of the cab. Sherlock squirmed and wriggled against him, trying to get out of John’s grasp. The legs of the robot weren’t exactly soft and John could already feel bruises starting to form. “I said knock it off, Sherlock, or I’m not going to put you down and you can just stay in the bloody sling!”

“I have legs, John. I can walk on my own.” Sherlock shifted again, harder this time.

“I will put you down when we reach the crime scene, but I need to warn the others first.” John tightened his grip until the legs went still. “This isn’t something you just drop on people. They might be...”

“Amazed?”

“I was leaning more towards shocked.” John rounded a corner and now he could see Lestrade standing by a crumbled form on the ground. Anderson and Donovan were a little further off, inspecting something near a stack of rubbish bins.

“John!” Lestrade turned towards him. The smile on the other man’s face vanished when he didn’t see anyone else. “Where’s Sherlock?” He frowned. “Why are you wearing a baby sling covered in tiny skulls?”

John’s tongue flicked out, wetting his lips. He’d tried to come up with a very normal explanation for Sherlock’s current condition, but no matter how hard he tried, it wandered into the realm of science fiction. “Sherlock’s here.”

Lestrade gave John an odd look. “No, he’s not. Sherlock’s rather a noticeable person, John.”

“I’m here, Lestrade.” Sherlock took advantage of John being distracted and shifted his body until the top half of the jar was sticking out above the sling. “John, set me down. I have a case to solve.”

Lestrade stared at the glowing jar for a moment before he burst out laughing. “This is some kind of joke, right? You two are having a laugh. How’s he doing this? Is it done by remote control or is it some kind of puppet or what?”

John carefully set Sherlock on the ground. Sherlock took off towards the body, moving nimbly on his mechanical legs. “That isn’t a puppet or a joke”

Both of them watched as the brain began to pace around the corpse. John could hear Sherlock making observations and occasionally, the robot would give a very familiar twirl of glee. Donovan and Anderson had now turned and were staring at the glowing jar. They looked very confused. Lestrade shifted closer to John. “That really is him, isn’t it? Do I even want to know how he managed to do that to himself?”

John gave him the information Sherlock had determined to be worth mentioning. Judging by the look on Lestrade’s face, the man had known nothing about Sherlock’s being injured. John had to cut himself short since both Donovan and Anderson were now arguing with Sherlock and things were starting to get very ugly very fast. Donovan must have said something particularly nasty, because Sherlock made a couple of rude gestures in her direction (John hadn’t even known it was possible for Sherlock to do that), and now she was lashing out with her foot. John was moving before he realized and managed to get between the two of them before any actual damage could occur.

“That’s enough.” Lestrade glared at everyone involved before totally focusing on Sherlock. “What have I told you about fighting at my crime scenes, Sherlock?”

“I wasn’t the one who started it, Lestrade.” John could almost feel the anger radiating from the glowing blue jar. “Shall I tell them what you said, Donovan?”

Lestrade ran his fingers through his hair. “Could we just solve the murder? Please.”

“Fine.” Sherlock straightened up. “He was killed by someone he worked with. You can tell by the gashes here, here, and over there. All the wounds were created by a knife with an oddly curved blade. Such a blade is often used in a butcher shop, just like the shop where this man worked. How did I know he worked there? He still has blood under his fingernails which isn’t human, plus he had a card for the shop in his pocket. He was sleeping with the co-worker’s wife. Very simple, very obvious. Even Anderson should have been able to figure this out. Come along, John.”

Sherlock began walking away at a rapid pace. It didn’t take John very long to catch up. “Sherlock.” Sherlock ignored him. “Do you want to tell me what she said?” When Sherlock still didn’t answer, John moved around in front of him and then crouched down. “Whatever it was, it doesn’t matter. You might be a bit shorter and a glow like a jellyfish, but everything that made you who you are is still here.”

John missed Sherlock having a face because he’d actually started noticing very small signs of emotion from time to time. They always vanished as rapidly as they appeared, but John caught them. Sherlock was silent for a moment. “I miss my violin.” His words were so soft John had to strain his ears to hear them.

“Maybe Mycroft’s people can see about making you a pair of arms.” John gave him a smile. “Think of all the things you could do with them.”

“I could work on my experiments again.” Sherlock gave a little hop. “You really think they could do it?”

“Sherlock, they managed to not only keep your brain alive, but gave it a robot to play in. If anyone could improve on what you already have, it would be Mycroft’s people.” John was willing to bet a couple of them would bend over backwards to have the chance to upgrade Sherlock’s technology.

“What are we waiting for?” Sherlock was practically bouncing as he started walking again. “Call him and have someone pick us up.”

Still smiling, John grabbed his mobile out of his pocket and began to dial.


End file.
